The cousin's reception...

Continued from A cousin's wedding - the preparation for our side's reception....

OK. Unlike more formal functions with fixed itenaries and timing, this reception has a loose timetable for guests. They came come in from 11:30 am till 3 pm to have their meal and leave as they wish. For me though, the reception practically starts just before noon, when our Singaporean relatives came by the drove with 7 cars...

That's my wife and kid with my lovely first cousins... well, one of them is married to a cousin, so still considered a cousin right?

Uncle Man, the leader of the Singaporean relatives entourage...


After some time exchanging news and greetings at the lobby, the Singaporeans came in.


Meanwhile some other family members have started their meals...




It was some time before I noticed the bride's family waiting at the lobby...


That's dad and mum along with my younger brother who also helped usher in the guests.


Time for the newly-weds to make an appearance.


In time they were up on the pedestal.


With that the formal part of the reception started...






What I liked though was the coin-throwing ceremony towards the end...

I don't know if it is practiced at all Johorean weddings but for our family who hailed from Muar, it is at least a family tradition practiced as far as I could remember.

The idea is simple. The bride and groom would throw out coins along with sweets and goodies for the kids (sometimes adults too) to collect... and keep...

Oh. Now I remember. When I was a kid in Muar, this was done at every wedding I've attended. And I remember waiting for this part with bated breath since as far as I was concerned it is the best part of a wedding.

After a time only family members and few close friends were left.

I must say thoughout the reception I had a difficult time keeping check of Al-Rasyid and following him around. Then again he is just a chip off the old block, hehe...

Anyway another best part of the wedding is the family photography session.

Once upon a time I found this cumbersome. Now that I'm turning 40 I find it a sweet reminder of the meaning of life...

For despite all the people you've met at all parts of the world there is nothing like family.

Sure you could have best friends that always help you out in the most dire times of need. But that's why you say such a friend is like family. Despite the fact that there are also turmoils and bad blood in an actual family at the end of the day a family is the ultimate symbol of closeness between human beings.

That's why when you really love a woman you should marry her. Then she becomes family. And when the union is consumated resulting in children people say you've made a family...

Anyway that's the oldest family member to attend the reception. I've forgotten how old is my granduncle Tok Su Sehat but he should be no less than 86.

A cousin's wedding - the preparation for our side's reception...

Excursion from the Brunei stories. Early this month I wrote a number of articles regarding a cousin's wedding :-

Attending the Nikah (solemnisation) ceremony of a cousin

The bride's home wedding reception on Saturday

My first taste of a Chinese tea ceremony for newly-weds...

The antics at the Shangri-La penthouse

The lavish night reception at Shangri-La

OK. I must say this. Referring to the lavish night reception... contrary to the impression that some parties might give to make others think they are the rich folks and well-connected ones, that reception was actually a join effort, not just the bride's. That means the cost were shared and both sides of the family have important luminaries as guests. In fact I'd dare say throughout the weekend's many functions, my side of the family footed most of the bill.

Now comes the next and last function, the groom's wedding reception held over the recent weekend fully funded by the groom's family with the help of our extended family (sorry if I have to mention this). With due respect to my cousin and his mother my beloved auntie, I must say there are certain aspects of the whole affair that bugs me. Just because our family love our kampung Malay roots does not mean we lack sophistication and thus could be dismissed aside by those who thinks they are more glamorous and of higher status. Mind you... if you have to define status and respect by wealth then I must stress that our family is OLD MONEY. The generation after our immediate grandfather might have to start all over again because of fortunes lost during the period of turmoils after World War I and World War II but we actually came from a line of nobles and royalty.

For those who couldn't understand the significance of this, therein lies the difference. There are those who became rich only after the DEB (New Economic Policy) begans to show its fruits in the 1980s and I've seen many of them trying to conceal their kampung roots for fear of losing their artificially acquired air of sophistication and taste. Well, for those who already have fortune and status for many many generations that is not the case. Having been really well-bred generation after generation (not well-bred as in the term created by the plastic new upper class of the 20th century as defined by capitalism of which snobbery is considered a part), they have certain qualities which become part of the blood, a certain confidence and dignity which does not need appearance of wealth, a character which makes them comfortable sitting among the lowest level of society without feeling diminished even a bit.

There I've said my mind. On the the subject at hand, the groom's wedding reception and here, the preparation...

The night before reception our extended family were busy helping out with the final touch...

We decided to do this at an auntie's place in Ampang as it was closest to Dewan (hall of) Merak Kayangan where the reception would be held.

Another auntie, the groom's mum (not in pix) then said, why don't someone take pictures for posterity. So I started snapping a few. I'm sorry auntie if I've lashed a few words at the start of this article. It's just I'm pissed off at certain things I saw, things which I consider as lack of respect for our family. Obviously a well-bred person should know how to respect others and not just expect others to give them respect. Then again I'm the vocal rebel who tends to kick out protocols (do I need to mention my father's full royal lineage to justify my actions? Now I'm being snobbish, but only in the face of others' snobbery). Sorry again...

In the wee hours of the morning we have to check out the hall...

While sure there were paid workers preparing for the reception, we as a family needed to do our part to make sure it was an affair to remember.

For one it has always been in our family spirit and tradition to dirty our hands and help out each other as much as we can. Just because some of us are bigshots doesn't mean to we have to pay workers to get everything done.

There. One more look before we call it a day.


Morning after we came in early to make some last minute checks.


Look's like the hall is already well-prepared to receive visitors...

One-year-old Al-Rasyid making inspection, hehe...

There. He agreed that we were ready to rock and roll...

Oh. Inside one of the rooms it seems the goodies were still being prepared.

Anyway before noon we were all ready for action. To be continued...

Views of Brunei's golden-domed mosque and its surroundings

Continuing the Brunei trip stories...

Monday 2nd August we went to Masjid Omar Ali Saifuddin (also spelt Saifuddien) famous for its golden dome, said to be actually built using solid gold!

Besides it lies a lake which provides interesting perspective to the surroundings.

There is some sort of barge permanently moored at one side.

Let's take a walk across the lake.

A look behind and you can already see the kind of angle provided from the lake.

The end of the walkway...

There lies a village called Kampung Kedayan along the lake's perimeters.

Walk a certain distance and you could see the barge with respect to the mosque.

For information most postcard pictures of this monumental landmark of Brunei were taken from around here. You can find such pictures using Google and make comparisons...